When I read this I had tears for this girl. She would probably love to get some mail.

Woman Alone On Idaho Death Row
Robin Lee Row

Carol reached out and touched my hand. That was the first time someone had touched me without putting restraints on me. . . it was a life line for me. I so desperately, at that point, wanted to be hugged. But I knew that was forbidden.


Robin has been in solitary confinement for over seven years.
Why? Because she is the only woman on death row in the prison and not allowed any contact with the other women prisoners even when they are brought (for punishment) to her area of the prison or the "hole" as it is referred to.

She can hear them calling to each other from their cells but Robin is not allowed to make her presence known. She never leaves her cell unless she is handcuffed and must even keep these on to shower. She is strip searched every day and her cell searched daily too.

Robin has had to eat her meals on her bed all of the time. Also for whatever the reason may be, she has been denied things that the male death row inmates can have. She has her own TV because her friend's mother bought it for her, also a radio but must wear earphones at all times. She is the only one on her tier so that just doesn't make sense. (She has a table that is attached to the wall, as is her bed, and that is all of the furniture that she has. Both the TV and radio sit on the table).

Over the Christmas Holidays, Idaho had a buffet for the inmates but Robin was excluded. Robin is not allowed out of her cell except one hour for recreation and three times a week for a shower. She is no longer allowed to use the "Legal Library" and must send out written requests for books to read.

She is obliged to see the psychiatrist once a month otherwise she is considered belligerent. About a year ago he told her he was concerned for her welfare because the guards reported that she seemed a little unhappy. So Robin told him that perhaps she was a little depressed. After being taken back to her celI, and within the hour, four guards arrived and took everything away from her - clothes, bedding, everything - stripped her naked and they told her she was on suicide watch. Robin is now afraid to be too happy and yet if she does not smile this might happen to her again. She lives in a kind of permanent limbo.

Even visits are curtailed to immediate family, which means that she has vlrtually no contact with another living being unless in prison uniform. Last year, on June 3,1998 a death warrant was issued - Robin's date of execution was set for 16 June - it seemed the answer to end all this. None of us had any right to tell her otherwise but we did not want her to die.

He slid a document across the table to me. I picked it up and saw in bold type the words, "DEATH WARRANT."

Robin recalls, "I should have known that something was up. I'm never handcuffed in front. I was taken to the counseling room with Carol Dillon, the institution's counselor. . . Deputy Warden sat across from me. He slid a document across the table to me. I picked it up and saw in bold type the words, "DEATH WARRANT." My eyes teared up and my throat choked me. The Deputy Warden commenced to read it to me. . . in less than 15 days I would be dead. When the deputy Wardenhad finished, he looked up at me and I could see compassion in his eyes. By then the tears were flowing down my cheeks. . .he commented that he had heard I didn't wish to appeal. I nodded to confirm that because I couldn't speak. . . He left the room. Carol (Robin's spiritual advisor) reached out and touched my hand. That was the first time someone had touched me without putting restraints on me. . . it was a life line for me. I so desperately, at that point, wanted to be hugged. But I knew that was forbidden.

"I was taken back to my room. I was numb - alI I could do was just sit on my bunk (there is no chair in the cell) and stare at the walls. Something I'm accustomed to doing. . . How would my execution affect my family and friends? It's always the ones left behind who suffer most. Myself, I'm not afraid to die. . . since I am writing this it's obvious that I wasn't executed on June 18th. I did receive a stay from the US District Court in Boise, Idaho. Why? I changed my mind. My attorney, Rolf, feels my chances are good once I reach the Ninth Circuit Court of appeals.

"I know most of you think everyone on death row claims to be innocent. In my case, it's true! . . . I couldn't leave behind the legacy that if I died everyone would think the children's mother killed them.

"I wanted to die when I heard my children were dead. The pain I felt was excruciating. It was as if my heart had been ripped out of my chest and stomped on, tearing it to shreds. . . At first memories would come rushing back through my mind and they were so hard to handle. A commercial would remind me of my son or I'd hear a song that was my daughter's favorite. All over I'd see them or think of them. The agony was unbearable. . .

"I'm tired. Emotionally drained. I'm lonely. Living in isolation is a hard thing. I wanted out and saw execution as a way out."

Robin Lee Row #40171
PWCC Housing Unit 4
PO Box 6049
Pocatello, Idaho 83205

_________________
Donna K. Brown